2005-11-09 - 8:34 p.m.

Mike and I moved into a new apartment this weekend. We were a little sad to leave our “deluxe apartment in the sky…” (The Jefferson’s, anyone?) , for a smaller, not so-high in the sky one
(old one was on the 20th, new one is on the 8th floor of one of these) But guess who was most definitely NOT invited to our new place? THE DOZERS! Yep, those pesky construction workers who love to renovate any and all apartments around us have been left in the dust-their own dust, really. No more drilling and pounding the walls at 6:30 am. No more occasions to march myself into the Dozer’s apartment at the crack of dawn and yell “STOP IT!” and point at my imaginary wristwatch as if to say, “Do you have any idea how early it is??” (One time when I did this, the guy running the drill actually saluted me. Funny stuff.) I will not miss them one tiny little bit. Our new place has its own noise issues, though not as terrible as the Dozers.

Our apartment overlooks one of the busiest intersections in Shanghai. Starting around 7 am, we are treated to a symphony of horn honking and tires squealing, and the occasional sound of metal on metal when the oh-so-fabulous taxi-drivers hit other cars. It’s not so bad though. We are already used to it.
Random Shanghai story…Mike and I went into the corner store tonight and were accosted by so much stimuli we almost had simultaneous seizures. First of all, let’s review the standard Chinese corner store. Very small. Too many employees. Impatient people jockeying for position in the check-out line by shoving and elbowing. Oh yeah, and of the 10 people crammed into tiny store, one them is usually singing, and another one is yelling at someone. Maybe this happens regularly in corner stores in the States, but maybe since I grew up there I never paid attention. I will from now on. I want to write a book about random corner store experiences. Anyway….
Before we even made it into the actual store, we had to step around two men with a hacksaw and a bicycle who positioned themselves directly in front of the door. Why? One man was holding the bike’s lock at a suitable angle so the other man could saw away at it, presumably in hopes of it falling off. Things are never what they seem here, though. It could have been for fun. The lock was doing its job rather well, securing the back wheel to the frame and preventing it from turning. They weren’t having much luck. I wonder if it was even their bike. I also wonder why no one seemed to care that they were clogging the doorway. Once inside, we were greeted by the loudest cashier my dainty little ears have ever heard. She looked mean as a snake, and the whole time she rang up purchases, she let loose a string of what I can only assume were not nice Chinese words. I think she was berating other employees who were strategically standing out of her line of sight. I’m not sure. She never looked directly at us. She just yelled. And yelled. And yelled some more. I was trying to buy toenail clippers for 7 Yuan, and all I had was a hundred Yuan bill. I started fishing in my pockets for change because I was scared she would yell at me for giving her such a big bill for a small purchase. I couldn’t find any, so I asked Mike. He started fumbling around for change, and just then I noticed mean cashier lady actually look at me- and she wasn’t happy. I don’t know if we were taking too long or she saw that I was about to give her 100 Yuan, but I know evil when I see it…so I whispered to Mike “KEEP LOOKING!” She glared at me a second time. “I’m scared!” I whimpered to Mike. Mike glanced up at the cashier and whispered, “Me too!” Thankfully Mike found 7 coins, and with a shaking hand I gave her the coins. Then I remembered that this was actually a very amusing situation. Mike and I were both terrified of this little old lady behind the counter. What could she possibly do to us? Yell in a language we don’t quite understand? We had already heard that, so I thought… wow lady, for some reason, I’m fixin to be nice to you….I flashed the toothiest, gummiest smile I could manage, and in a loud voice I said sweetly, “XIE XIE!” (Thank you) and just stood there. Smiling. I got nothing from her. She didn’t even pause for breath in her endless tirade. So I repeated it, this time a little louder. Satan stirred this time, nodding just a teeny bit in my direction, all the time yelling. Then I said “BYE BYE!” and this time –GASP- Satan spoke! She said “BYE BYE!” although the tone was more like “GET OUT OF MY STORE FOREIGNER!” It made me feel warm all over. Just kidding. I have found a new way to amuse myself. I will stroll the streets of Shanghai and force mean, yelling people through awkwardness and stubbornness (and maybe a little bit of stupidity) to return social greetings.
More random Shanghai happenings….people work really hard in China. Americans should be ashamed. They work so hard they fall asleep everywhere. Here’s a guy sleeping on the steps.

Or maybe he’s embarrassed because he lost at this game of _____________

(insert name of this game-Chinese chess maybe- I've seen sets like this before). Seriously, the Chinese work ethic is top notch. We should take note. I am too lazy to do anything about my laziness though...

Mike is on an 18 hour planeride to the States as I type this. Let's play the "I wonder, would Mike rather... game..." Would he rather ride for 18 hours in an airplane, or stand at our new intersection and listen to the sounds of the lovely rush-hour traffic for 18 hours?" I'm bettin he would pick the airplane. Oh yeah, so here he is in a very overexposed picture on our balcony.

I hope everyone has a very nice day. If it starts turning ugly,just remember- things could always be worse. Just ask the employees of our new corner store:)

?lt;/P>

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