|
|
2004-10-05 - 6:44 p.m. ****All you travel-savy and worldly people, be warned. I am from ARKANSAS. I did not leave the south until I was 22, and my oh so impressive travel resume includes Mexico. And now China. So snicker away and think oh she's so naive....I'll even help you. Look for these "***" little boogers -they signal a story chock full of naivety. (Did i spell that right? there is no spell check on here I can't spell.) My mother also seems convinced that I am of the "new soul" variety of humans, meaning "1st time on the planet". I think it's a nice way of saying I'm slow. haha mom. now let's get started... My suspicions have been confirmed. Mike is completely charmed. I got my hair cut in the same salon he did and they didn't bat an eye at me. No cowd gathered round, no picture-taking. It was quite boring compared to Mike's royal treatment. I did get a nice choppy hairdo though. I was brave. He cut lots off. I really didn't want it this short- He kept chopping away, and Chinese words kept popping into my head that were completely irrelevant- words for "left", "right", Nan Dan Dong (our street), and "how much", but nothing came to mind for "for the love of god stop cutting my hair!!!!" I think he noticed my pained expression and held up my hair and said "your hair terrible. I make beautiful." Thanks, buddy. It's not bad- lots of layers. I'm thisclose to that awful Jennifer Aniston haircut but Mike wants to secretly have all of her babies so maybe this will work for me. ***I had heard of the toilets that are just holes in the ground and I am happy (oh goodness not really) to report that they are here. I'm scared of public toilets anyway (yes I saw that show MythBusters that proved that human hands are dirtier- I'm still scared of germies) but these take the hover method to a whole new level. And half the time there is no toilet paper. People carry tissues with them. Lovely. I am also amazed at the amount of fish consumed in China. Yes shanghai is right on the edge of the ocean or sea (I'm not a geography whiz--shocking, i know) but it's a little out of hand. They use the stuff like salt and pepper. Mike says there's a guy who stands at the kitchen door with fistfulls of fish (yuck) and piles it on dishes as they head for the tables. I have visions in my head of some sort of rogue chef dressed all in black, with a bandana around his face armed with nothing but a bucket of seafood. His sole mission in life is to ensure that all visitors to China enjoy all the tasty treats from the sea. He visits kitchens at night, and adds ingredients to all the vegetable dishes. Kind of like Santa, but only if you looooove seafood. Nothing is safe for vegetarians. I ordered "vegetables and rice" and I got vegetables and rice- and lots and lots of shrimp, sea urchin, octopus, and squid. I'm lying about the sea urchin- i just wanted to type it. Mike ordered something with noodles and got lots of pork. Yay, pork. we ordered tofu and it came covered in cuddle fish shavings. CUDDLE FISH SHAVINGS? I have no idea what a cuddle fish is, how someone managed to shave it, or what it was doing on top of my tofu. I almost cried. If you eat meat or are one of those "to appreciate a culture you have to immerse yourslef in it-EAT THE FOOD!" kind of people, you are probably rolling your eyes right now, and sighing that poor Julie will never truly experience China. Yeah yeah yeah. I just want some vegetables- no fish.
?lt;/P> 
|
Tune in tomorrow, and I'll tell you all about my harrowing experience getting lost in this neverending market. Mike had to go up to the 27th floor of an apartment building across the street and look for my hair to find me. i'm kidding.